This love letter is for the first doctor that diagnosed me with bipolar illness. Dr W. I am still thankful for that. It has been nearly 10 years of ups and downs I guess. You have never given up on me.
People might saya “wow…. anne is so blessed to still be able to work… aerospace engineer lagi walaupon ada bipolar”. Yeah right. And many never know how much I struggle to keep functioning as it seems. How many extended medical leaves and unpaid leaves, how many drugs mods and their side effects, how much tears of hopelessness, how many cuts and drops of bloods, how many hospitalizations, how many times “jatuh terduduk menangis kat kaki lima”. You are a few that know. No…. they just say I’m the lucky one. Well whatever, that’s not the point.
Thank you for trying your best even if I’m no longer under your care. Your hands might be tight at the back, but you did the best you could. It is nobody’s fault if I don’t survive this…. totally mine. You have done everything in your power, even jeopardising your relationship with your ex colleagues. Some sneers that patients at private hospital are not that sick and are attention seekers. But I also know, being a doctor at private hospital is tough too. I have so many times heard the bad perceptions about private doctors are there just for money. But I don’t think that of you. I know you care….. You played a pivotal role in my health for the past ten years, I trust your judgement, your advice, your recommendation even when it came about other illness of mine. So thank you. Thanks. May Allah’s blessing be upon you all the time.